lost_boy | (no subject)

It was just over a month I had been in Darrow now and while I didn't think it was fair to say I was easily settling in, I also didn't think it would be fair to say I wasn't.

It was an entirely different world from the one I was used to. I barely remembered London and what it was like to live there, although the longer I spent away from Peter, the more memories returned to me. I could see my mother's smile now, which was a far cry from just barely being able to hear the song she used to sing to me. I could also remember the fear in her eyes when my father came home from the pub, drunk and angry. But besides that, London seemed like a dream that had happened to someone else.

Peter's Island was my basis for comparison. And while there were strange things here, there were no mermaids, none of the Many-Eyed, and no pirates. It seemed like there might be fairies, but they weren't the traditional kind, the ones who had conspired with Peter. The ones whose homes I'd inadvertently burned to the ground. Darrow was less strange for me. Or it was strange in different ways and I thought I was still adjusting.

I liked the people I had met. Most of them, anyway. They were generally kind and meant well, even if the grown ups working at the Children's Home seemed to have too many responsibilities and not enough time. They tried, which was more than I had honestly expected, except for one of the volunteers I just didn't like. I felt like he looked too long at the girls, maybe even sometimes at me and Eddie, but I didn't know what to say about it, so for now I was just watching.

That the grown ups were so busy usually meant it was easy to sneak out, especially since Beverly had shown me how. I couldn't sleep tonight and so I left Eddie asleep in his bed and walked silently down the hall. Peter's Island may not have been the sort of place I wanted to return, but I had learned many things there, things that could still work to my benefit here. Sneaking out wasn't very difficult at all and soon I was standing out on the sidewalk with my face turned up toward the sky.

The night was still hot. Muggy. It wasn't that late, there were still grown ups out, walking to and from bars, laughing and holding hands. I watched curiously as a woman leaned into her partner, whispering in his ear, and he laughed and then spun them around to head in a different direction. Another couple, both of them men, were talking quietly and sincerely as they walked, but I didn't think they were angry. I thought maybe they were just... comfortable.

It was all so normal here. Liking boys, liking girls. I had no idea what I felt about any of it, but as long as I was thinking about Sal, I supposed it didn't really matter.

I hadn't thought to move on from standing right out in front of the Children's Home and it only occurred to me as I realized someone was approaching from behind, that standing here and gawking at people was the best way to get caught. I braced myself, expecting one of the staff to grab me by the shoulder and drag me back in to bed.

Threaded | Flat

Gradually, she's been spending less and less time here. She's still careful about it, of course, not wanting to ruin a good thing at Hopper's by overstaying her welcome, but Beverly can't pretend that the Home doesn't make her uneasy. She times her showers so she won't have to do so while she's staying here; she still hears things, sees things, though by now that all seems to be dismissed as normal, at least as far as she can tell. What was once unnerving is now something to get used to. The staff is bothered, or she's pretty sure they are, but there isn't anything they can do, so it continues. And she would much rather sleep somewhere she feels safe than keeping one eye open because she doesn't know what might happen.

On nights like this, then, especially without school in the morning to worry about, she likes to sneak out and smoke, or just wander around. A few times, she's even gone out to the boardwalk, quiet at this hour, everything closed. Back home, she spent nearly all of her free time outdoors. It isn't as if they keep her cooped up in the Home, but it still doesn't feel quite the same, so she might as well enjoy of it what she can.

She isn't expecting to see anyone out front, but with that being the case, she isn't surprised that it's Jamie, smiling as she walks towards him. "Relax, it's just me," she says, keeping her voice pitched low, though the odds of being heard from out here seem incredibly slim. "You gonna keep staring or do you want to get out of here?"